Ask HER — Quick Answers

The one-paragraph version of everything HER covers, for when you already know the question and just want the answer.

How do I run a background check on someone I'm dating?

Pick a service built for personal safety searches — Checkr for a full, verified first look, Spokeo if you only have an email or username — enter their full name plus city or state, and review the whole report, not just the criminal section. It's legal, it's normal, and it takes about five minutes. Full guide →

How do I tell if someone is catfishing me?

The clearest signs are consistency failures: photos that don't survive a reverse image search, a refusal to video call, a story that shifts between conversations, and always having a reason they can't meet in person. One red flag alone isn't proof — several together is a pattern worth investigating. Full guide →

Is it legal to run a background check on someone I'm dating?

Yes — you can legally run a background search using publicly available information for your own personal safety decisions. You just can't use the results for employment, housing, or credit decisions without FCRA compliance, and you can't access private accounts or install tracking software.

What's the best background check site for dating?

Checkr for a first-time, full-picture verified search; Spokeo if all you have is an email, username, or a suspected fake identity. Full comparison →

What are the biggest red flags to watch for on a first date?

How they treat waitstaff, whether they ask you any questions at all, how they react to small disagreement, and whether they push past a boundary you've already stated. Full list →

How do I know if someone is lying about being single?

Structured unavailability, never being invited to their home, phone protectiveness, and never meeting anyone from their life — any one alone has an innocent explanation, several together usually don't. Full guide →

What if the background check comes back clean?

A clean report means there's no public record of a problem — that's different from a guarantee. Use it as one data point alongside your own observations, the consistency of their story, and how they respond when you ask direct questions.

What's hiding on someone's phone?

Start with what you can legally check on a device you own or have permission to access — vault apps disguised as calculators or notes are the most common hiding spot, followed by VPNs, secret messaging apps, and hidden browsers. See the full series →

What are the "secret" vault apps people use to hide photos?

Vault apps hide photos and videos behind a decoy front — a working calculator, a notes app, or an audio player — that only reveals its real contents when you enter a separate passcode. The giveaway is usually a familiar-looking app you don't remember using, or one using more storage than its stated purpose would explain. See all 16 →